You can't change me! Yes Draco, I can (Draco Malfoy love story)
by WeAreAwesome598
Summary: People write these cute caring love stories about Draco, about how they cry in his arms and about how he holds them when they sleep. But how can you cry the arms of a broken man? Because that is what we all know Draco is. Broken. Why do we write these completely false stories? So read this one, because this is how a real Draco Malfoy love story is supposed to be.
1. Chapter 1

Kate:

Hey, I'm Kate. I'm not going to lie, I'm not too excited about telling you all about me.

You see, I prefer books. I prefer studying. I prefer marks. Things that can't lie.

Yet, my favorite pass time? Profiling, it's looking at a person's body language and figuring them out. It's connecting the dots, finding out the truth.

So maybe I'm not so science-y after all.

By the way, I'm tall with LONG brown hair that is almost always in some complicated plait. I also have clear brown eyes and i don't like wearing lots of make up. Except my lime perfume. I love citrus.

And I have brother that is 2 years older than me. His name is Blair Jon. He gets people to call him Blair, but he will always be BJ to me. (The editor for this story is ashamed for her dirty mind)

So that's me, I hope I was somewhat interesting.

Blair:

Hey people, I'm Bair. It's short for Bair Jon, but I prefer Blair. Don't listen to my sister when she calls me BJ. She's the only one that can do that.

I love playing sports. Although I don't get the point in that game where you ride around on brooms trying to kill yourself. Give me a ball and I'm happy though.

Like my sister, I get good grades. I like studying and learning. But my sister is the profiler, not me.

By the way, I'm very tall with shaggy brown hair and greenish eyes. I don't like to dress up and I almost never wear dress robes. My dad is a muggle, he taught us to think outside the box. My mom is a witch, she's annoying to be honest. She always wants to get her hair done.

thanks for listening :)

Zac:

Hey, my name is Zachary although most people call me Zac.

I'm very studious. Although Kate always beats me by about 2% of the time, it's really annoying. But she's pretty much my best friend so it's fine.

I also really like sports. I'm the keeper for the Ravenclaw team.

My parents are both muggles, therefore I'm a muggle born. But my friends and I don't care.

If you want to know, I'm really tall (like REALLY tall), I have brown-reddish hair and brown eyes.

So that's me, I'm pretty boring I know.

If you haven't fallen asleep yet, have a nice day :)

Tracey:

Hey, I'm Tracey. I have no idea why they asked me to do this... But anyway!

I'm not sure what to say. Although I can tell you that me and my little group (Zac and Kate) are very studious.

Although I'm louder than the other two. I'm smart, but I also get along well with the Weasley twins :p

As for looks, I'm shorter than the other two trees, I have long blonde hair and brown eyes.

I'm a pure blood, although I wish I wasn't. Some people give us a bad name.

So that's me!

 **Hey, Shells here (your author) what do you think of the characters?**

 **I'll have the first chapter up tonight :)**

 **reviews are always appreciated**

 **Bye my ponies :)**


	2. first day of the new year

Kate's P.O.V.:

I woke up and looked at the clock. I was late. Again. Tracey left without me. Again.

Looks like this year is going to be the same as all the rest. I hurriedly put on my clothes and rushed to great hall for breakfast. I just got out of the Ravenclaw common room to encounter Filch, there goes my plan of sprinting. As I'm walking I notice a boy with brown hair from walking with his friends. He's laughing but the smile is fake, he's looking to the left so he's making something up and he's not in stride with his friends. Looks like someone is telling a lie. I wander what he is lying abo- BAM

I walked into a wall. I really need to stop profiling random people...

The rest of my trip the great hall was uneventful.

I arrived and sat at the Ravenclaw table next to Tracey, Zac was on her other side. Tracey seemed to be arguing with him. Again.

"Trac, I see where you're coming from. But transfiguration is clearly more likely to help you in life than charms." Oh here we go, they're debating again. They always do this, and they're always both wrong. Tracey was about to reply when I cut in, "You're both wrong. Think about it. Defense against the dark arts is clearly going to be the most helpful." They looked at me with open mouths. Again.

"Okay Sherlock.", was Zac's reply. He knows I hate that name.

I was about to shout at him when he walked in. The blonde haired mystery boy. At least to me. From the first day I've been profiling him, trying to figure him out. He walks like everything is fine, but his face tells a anther story. I've talked to him a few times, he speaks like he's rehearsed his lines countless times. He speaks like he's hiding something. He looked at me with piercing gray eyes, eyes that showed fear.

"You need to stop obsessing over that git.", said my brother as he and his best friend Ryan took the two seats next to me. He then proceeded to steal my toast. "BJ!", he knows I hate it when he does that. Oh well... Looks like sixth year will be the same as always.

Zac tapped me on the shoulder to give me my time table. I looked at it, transfiguration now then double potions will that new guy, Slughorn.

-—-TIME SKIP TO AFTER TRANSFIGURATION-

The three of us were on our way to potions, transfiguration was good Zac and I kept on trying to answer each other's questions and Tracey got annoyed, so nothing new.

When we arrived at the dungeon, we saw the Slytherins where already there. Out of habit I looked over at Draco. He didn't bother to attempt to smile, the rings under his eyes had somehow become darker and if you looked closely you could see his swagger was gone. But his breathing revealed the most, he was on the edge of a breakdown. I was sure of it.

I need to find a way to help him, I thought. Urgh! If only he could read my body language and see I'm only trying to help!

Slughorn arrived, "Good morning students! Isn't it a lovely day.", he didn't give us time to respond, "Now I know you are used to working on your own in potions, but not in my class! So, I want you all to pick a partner from a different house! Off you go."

I knew this was my chance. I sneaked closer to Draco, Slughorn noticed him standing alone and saw I was closed to him, "You boy, partner up with this young lady here." He then walked off, I'd done it. Draco looked at me with a worried look in his eye but I only smiled. I knew what he needed, there would be no small talk today.

Slughorn grapped everybody's attention, "Alright class, I want a drought of living death from you and your partner! You have until the end of the lesson, off you go."

Draco looked at me again, he was scared I'd say something that he didn't want me to. But I wasn't going to, instead I simply said, "Two unicorn hairs please." He knew that it was fine then, he smiled and reached his eyes.

We fell into an order like that, no small talk, no confusion. Each of us just simply saying what we need or for how long. I knew he was relieved, I knew he needed this calm order.

At the end of the lesson Slughorn stood up to judge our potions, when he came to ours, he exclaimed, "Wow, this is something else right here. Absolutely perfect! This is a potions due I do not intend on to split up." To my surprise, Draco was relieved. He dismissed the class and we all left for lunch.

As I was walking I realized something, maybe I wouldnt find out the mysterious blonde's problems. Maybe I would keep him sane, maybe I would keep those problems from causing too much harm.

I smiled, maybe.

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	3. in the Slytherin common room

Draco's P.O.V:

Today was the first day of school. Again. I almost broke down. Again. She almost saw me break down. Again. So nothing new I guess.

It's terrible really, lying here on this hard couch in my common room. There are people studying here, people reading, people laughing. And then there's me. Lying on this hard couch wandering when the Dark Lord will kill me. I wish he would get it over with. Before she figures it out.

She's close to knowing everything I can tell. Who? You ask.

Kate. That long haired Ravenclaw who knows too much for her own good. I've heard stories about her, about the way she looks at you and knows everything. 'Profiling' is what it's called. It might as well be dark magic.

She's been profiling me. From the first day I saw her look at me I knew, she scans over you. Her eyes going up and down your body. Almost like Dumbledoor, expect he can't be sure he's right. She knows she is.

I wish she would stop, I wish she would leave me alone.

But the sick thing is, I need it. I need her. I need her calm looks, her comforting silence. And I hate myself for it.

Like today, I walked into potions after having a conversation with Snape that left me trying not to have a panic attack. She looked me the moment I walk in, her eyes scanning me. We were told to partner up and she was next to me before I could say anything.

I thought that she would say those words, those words that would make me breakdown. But she didn't.

Instead she smiled and asked for unicorn hair.

I hate myself for what happened next, I relaxed. She got me out of almost having a panic attack. And I hate it. I hate how we found a steady rhythm and worked happily. I hate how we made the best potion. And I hate that Slughorn told us to stay partners.

But I need it. I need every second of it. I need every comforting glance. Every scan of her eyes.

I've thought about just telling her, just letting her know everything. Stopping this game.

But then she might leave me. She might move on to her next project and I wouldn't survive that.

So I lie here on this hard couch in the Slytherin Common Room and watch everyone do their thing.

And I wait for the next scan of her eyes, the next comforting glance.

And I hate it.

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	4. library profiling

Kate's P.O.V.:

The rest of the week went by quickly. I handed in my assignments, read some books, made a few speeches and had some interesting conversations with Zac and Tracey.

However, now it was Saturday and I have nothing to do. I've completed all my work, Tracey is on a date and Zac is at quidditch practice. So I'm going to library. As I was walked I noticed a red head Gryffindor, I think her name is Ginny, talking to Harry Potter. She clearly likes him. It's obvious, to a profiler at least. I smirked at her and continued walking.

I reached the library and decided to read something about dragons. Once I found a book that looked interesting, I went back to my usual reading spot (a quiet corner with only two beanbag) and started reading.

I was just getting into my book when he walked in. His blonde hair was a mess, his hands were shaking and his breathing told a whole other story. Then he flinched when a first year bumped into him. That sent my mind wild. there are only two reasons why a person flinches. the first that they don't want to touch the person, they are disgusted. while the second reason is because the touch reminds them of something else, something they want to forget. I know that the first year is a pure blood, I think I will leave you to decide what that means.

But anyway, he's still here. He looks like he's trying to hide, he looks back at the door with fear in his eyes. I began to think about what I could do. I could just continue to watch, I might get more information that way. I could call him over to me. or I could give him a clue that I was there. I decided on the last one, so I threw my scarf around the corner. He saw it and he wasn't sure what to do. He could ignore it, but I knew he wouldn't. He was still unsure, then he gave a shudder and walked over to me.

When I saw him I only just managed not to gasp. His face was not only pale, but airbrushed with bruises too. His grey eyes were red and had dark bags. His hands were red and shaking. He was about to break. I thought of all the possibilities. I could talk to him, I could ignore him or I could let him decide. So, I held my hand out to him. I didn't say a word, only an action. He took my hand, he took my help.

I pulled him down and he settled on the other beanbag. I knew that talking to him now wasn't an option. Instead, I picked up the other book brought and offered it to him. He looked at me with confusion mixed into his other emotions. Then he took the book and started reading.

We didn't saw a word, we just read in silence. Once in a while I'd look at him, every time his breathing was better. I still didn't ask the question on my mind. I knew it could break him, instead I just read my book. After a long time Draco put the book down, he looked straight at me. He was still airbrushed with bruises. He simply said, "What are you doing?" That question could be taken any way, but I knew what he meant.

I got up, put my book down and said, "Keeping you sane."

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	5. detention

Kate's P.O.V:

I was late. Again.

Yes, I know I need to work on this. So now I'm running to Defence Against the Dark Arts class. Yes I know, I'm an idiot for being late to Snape's class. I wasn't even profiling people as I ran, so I really am in a hurry.

When I finally arrived Snape was not very happy with me and Zac was laughing at me.

Snape looked at me and said, "Nice of you to join us, but since you didn't want to join us... You can join me in detention."

I scaned him, he wasn't going to budge. So I just said, "Yes sir.", and took the seat next to Zac. He was silently laughing at me, I gave him one look and he shut up.

The rest of the lesson went by without much. We all got shouted at, but no points were lost.

When we were walking to lunch I saw mysterious blonde again. He looked better than he did on Saturday but that wasn't saying much. He was worried and annoyed though, that was for sure. He went and sat with some random Slytherin girl.

I was still upset because of the detention so I skipped the full profile this time.

Draco's P.O.V.: (after school is finished)

God I hate myself.

I can't believe I went and allowed her to see me so exposed. And again, I needed it. I needed that glance she gave me before she gave me the book. I needed her hand as she held it out to me. I need her.

God I hate myself.

Anyway, I've got quidditch practice today so at least I have that to look forward to.

Quidditch went well, but it started to rain as I left the pitch (I took longer than the rest to change).

Which meant I dragged mud inside and of course Filch had to come and see. He wasn't pleased.

He looked at me and said, "You runt! befouling the castle again! not on my watch, you can join the late one for detention tomorrow!" The late one? Who could that be? I wandered.

I'm still wandering, in fact, as I'm lying on the cold couch again.

This seems to be my go to place for self hate.

Oh well.

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	6. time for punishment

Kate's P.O.V:

I'm not happy. Why the hell did he need to give detention? I do everything right and I'm late once for his class!

Oh well, that's my vent over.

Now im on my way to my detention with Snape and trying to preoccupy my mind by profiling and my favourite mysterious blonde just stepped out of a classroom and is now walking in front of me.

Now, I'm going to be honest here and say that he has never looked this bad. I know he is just a bit taller than me, but now he looked a foot shorter. I know his blonde hair is close to grey, but now it looked like the colour had been sucked out of it. I know he walks with a 'swagger', but now he walks with a limp. I know he's breaking, but now he's shattering.

There was a certain broken beauty about him and yeah, I could love a broken person. Again the question burned on my mind and again I knew it would break him.

He's reading something too, it looked like it was a hand written letter. His hands were shaking and I knew silent tears were threating to run down his face. At that moment I considered skipping detention, I considered following him, I considered comforting him. He was going to have a panic attack.

He collapsed.

Now I wasn't just considering it.

Draco's P.O.V:

Why? Why? Why? Why?

Why me? Why this?

What did I do?

Please, someone tell me why my 'friends' just beat me. Tell me why my father sends me letters about how horrid I am. Tell me why the dark lord wants me broken.

And for the love of everything on this planet, tell me why I'm currently walking down the passage to detention, reading my father's letter, after being beaten by my 'friends' with her behind me.

Why? Why?

I can see Snape's office, I can get there without breaking down, she's still behind me. Ten steps away, I just need to breathe, she's still behind me. Seven steps now, I just need to think of something else, she's still following me. Six steps away, I can feel the panic attack coming, shes closer to me now. Four steps away, I'm falling I can't breath, I can't see her. Three steps away, I'm in her arms. I'm going to be okay.

I can't breathe, I find myself clinging to her. I've had panic attacks before, but not like this. Now I can't seem to breathe, I know I am breathing, but it's not working. She's lifting me off.

No. No. No. I can't do this, I need her. She can't push me away.

She's talking now, I know I need to consentrate. I know I need to hear what she is saying.

I can hear her. She's saying, "Look at me Draco, look at me. nothing else matters, just look at me."

So I do, I look at her clear brown eyes. I look at her face devoid of any make up. I look at her long hair done in some ridiculous plait. I look at her height, only just shorter than me. But now im out of things to look at, now my breathing is picking up. She's taken my hands, she's talking again.

She's saying, "Okay Draco. close your eyes now. just listen to my voice and do exactly as I say. just listen to my voice. breathe in for three seconds, squeeze my hands every second." I couldn't do it, I tried. I got to two seconds and my breathing became rapid. "It's okay. listen, breathe out for two seconds." I almost got that right. "breathe in for two seconds." I can do that better. "breathe out for four seconds." I did. "breathe in for three seconds." I did. "Breathe out for two seconds." I did. I did. I did. She kept on going and I got lost in doing as she said. She got me to focus on such a random thing. But it worked, I could control my breathing again.

I threw myself onto her, once again clinging to her. I breathed in her lime sent. I just felt her. I needed to. I needed to know something was real. Some part of me knew I had to walk those two more steps to Snape's classroom. Although I just wanted to stand here. I wasn't sure if I was holding her if she was holding me. But I needed it. I knew detention was important so I let go of her.

She looked at me with a look I could I could never describe.

And then walked into Snape's classroom.

Kate's P.O.V.:

I should have known that would happen. I should have known that he would have a panic attack.

I should have known. I'm just glad I was there. So glad I could calm him down.

I knew he was still fragile though, so as he walked in I smiled at him.

To some it might just be a smile, but I knew he understood. I knew he read 'I'm here' in that smile.

It turns out that detention meant washing old caldrons, it wasn't too bad. Draco's hands were shaking the whole time, I need to talk to him. I need to know what's wrong with him. I have suspicions, but I need to know. And I need to know the answer to the question that has been burning in my mind.

we didn't talk though, we didn't say a thing. That seems to have become our thing, at potions, in the library and now here. Maybe not talking was what helped him.

By end his hands had stopped shaking. Snape called us and told us we could go. Draco called me back as I started to walk.

"Kate!", he shouted, "Thank you."

"For what?", I asked.

He looked at me and said, "For keeping me sane."

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	7. common romms

Kate's P.O.V.:

Well, that was interesting. I knew he was close to breakdown, but I didn't know hed have a panic attack in front of me!

I still didn't ask the question that was burning in my find, if I don't ask soon I think it might brand itself in my head.

I really need to clear my head, I really need to talk to BJ.

That is why I'm currently speed walking to the common room praying he will be lying on the comfy blue couch.

And he was. He was sitting there with an expression somewhere between worry and a smirk. I don't like to profile my brother, he always knows when I am. But now I decideded to do a quick profile. He is sitting with his head back, he's chilled. His feet are up, he's relaxing (he's probably been waiting got me to come back). And his face is smug.

"Stop profiling me.", was the first thing he said. I told you he always knows. Although now he seems to have other questions to ask me. "I heard you had detention with Draco, how did that go?"

Great, now I'm into one of his in depth discusssions. '"It was fine.", came my short answer.

He rolled his eyes, "Kate, you may be the profiler... but I know my sister." I sighed, I wasn't getting out of this one. So i sat down.

"How bad was he?", my brother asked. He knows about Draco. Not everything, just that I wouldn't be profiling him so much if he wasn't bad.

"Panic attack.", was the only answer I could manage.

He sighed and wrapped his arm around me. "Just keep helping him, you will get through to him eventually."

Before you ask, my brother knows everything. He knows the question that is threatening to brand itself on my mind. He knows my thoughts. He just knows me.

"I know B, I know. It's just so frustrating some times, I keep on helping him and hoping he will realize. But his walls are so high!" BJ smiled at me.

He said, "If the walls are high, then don't try and destroy them. Just grow some ivy to climb over them."

"With what seeds B?", yeah we have conversations like this. I told you we were debaters.

My brother smiled at me and said, "The ones that come from your very own wall."

I got up and said, "Thanks B."

Now I know what do. Now I know what to tell him. Now know I know how to get through to him.

I wouldn't break down his walls, instead I would just climb over.

Draco's P.O.V:

What the hell did I just do?

Why the hell did I just open up to her?

Why the hell did she help me?

Before you ask, yeah I am sitting on the cold couch in the common room. It's that time of day again.

However, before I could start my self loathing session Bliase walking in.

He said, "I heard you had detention with Long Hair, how bad did you break?" He knows, his parents are the same so we tend to help each other.

I got up to make place for him and said, "Panic attack." He sighed and leaned back.

I looked at him again and said, "I just wish she would leave me alone!"

He looked at me, "Draco, is that really what you want?" I looked down, we both knew the answer to that question.

"Have you ever considered telling her?"

"Telling her what?", I replied.

"Everything. Tell her what they do to you. Tell her what the dark lord makes you do. Tell her the lies your father makes you believe."

"I can't do that Blaise. if I do she might move on, she might deicide that she has solved the mystery. And I wouldn't survive if she wasn't there to make me sane."

He hit me.

"Draco, how stupid can you get? She saw you have a panic attack! If she was going to leave she would have done it already."

I rubbed my head where he hit me and said, "Maybe"

Maybe he's right. Maybe she wont give up on me. Maybe

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	8. bathrooms

**You knew this was coming :)**

 **And translations will be written in** _italics in brackets_

BJ's P.O.V.:

I really hope Kate gets through to Draco. She is the only one who can.

And we all know he needs help. He is so lost.

But anyway, I am just doing my usual think about everything while working to the dorms.

Usually I'm thinking about home in South Africa, but now I'm thinking about Draco. I really wish he would just join the family already.

Oh look, speak of him and he shall appear. Draco is currently walking very quickly with Potter behind him. I don't like the sound of this.

Because of my sister I have learnt some basic profiling and I can tell you with full confidence that he is the closest to breaking he has ever been. And that Potter is not helping at all.

I ran up to him to see if I could help. Or at least distract Potter.

"Draco!', I called to him. Once I got closer I spoke softer and said, "Okay Draco, relax. What's up?"

He couldn't answer. He could barely breathe. And Potter was watching the whole time.

"Okay Draco. Calm down. Walk to the bathrooms.", he was trying to.

Then he was speaking, "Blair, please fetch Kate. I can't... Please."

Of course! I'm an idiot, Kate was the answer! He was still asking, still begging. He honestly believed I would leave him. "Okay, I'm going to go fetch her."

"Please, I need her. I can't... She has to come... Please.", he was panicking again.

I looked him in the eye and said, "Okay Draco, go to the bathrooms and try and calm down. Kate will meet you there."

Relied flooded his eyes and he took off to the bathroom. Potter was following. I wish I could tell him to leave, but getting to Kate was more important.

I don't think I have ever ran that fast. I sprinted to the common room praying she would be there.

She was. She was also surrounded by a bunch of our friends. I need to tell her without the others knowing...

Very quickly I remembered that because we come from South Africa, English isn't our first language. Afrikaans is.

So I raced to her and said, "Jy moet na die seuns badkamer to gaan. Hy het you nodig," ( _you must go the boy's bathroom. He needs you)_. She looked at me with wide eyes, she understood.

She got up and said, "Hoe slag is hy?" ( _How bad is he?)_

I shook my head sadly and replied, "Die ergste wat hy ooit gewees het." _(The worst he's ever been.)_

That was all she needed, she sprinted out of the common room. Leaving our friends very confused.

I hope she gets there in time.

Kate's P.O.V.:

I ran to the bathrooms, it has finally happened. He has finally broken.

I am just so thankful that my brother was there, that he could call me.

I'm almost at the bathrooms, just before I went I peaked through the door.

Draco was looking at himself in the mirror, leaning against the sink to try and stay on his feet. His jersey lay on the floor and he was removing his tie. He felt constricted. He hasn't broken. No, he has shattered. And I was watching.

I stepped into the bathroom, before I could ran to him I saw Potter.

I looked at him and said," Leave. Now." He looked at me like I had gone mad before running away.

Draco heard my voice and looked at me. Relief flooded his eyes as he practically threw himself on me. He clung to me as he tried to keep the sobs at bay. He was trying to stop it. He was trying to stop all the pain. He couldn't take the pain. When you have a breakdown it feels like your body is just a shell, and they are trying to test how much awful feelings you can endure. He was trying to stop it. He was trying to breathe and make it go away. But it wasn't going to work. He needed to stop trying.

So he softly whispered to him, "Draco, it's okay. Let go, I'm here. I will catch you, let it out."

He did. As soon as I finished speaking, his grip tightened on me. Nearly all of his weight was on me. His back was shaking with each sob. He couldn't seem to stop. He just kept his head on my shoulder. He just kept his grip on me.

I just kept on holding him. I kept on running my hand threw his hair. I kept on letting him cry.

I couldn't tell you how long we stood there. I couldn't tell you how long he cried. Eventaully I didn't feel tears in my shirt. He seemed to have run out of tears. But he was still breaking. He was just dry sobbing.

Eventaully he stopped. Eventually his breathing became less rapid. But he just kept his grip on me. He was just hugging me now. Just relaxing.

After a while he lifted his head from my shoulder and looked at me. I knew in that moment that I couldn't ask him now, I couldn't find out his story now. I couldn't. Because if I did he would break again and he wouldn't be able to handle that.

He was still looking at me, now fear was in his eyes. I softly said to him, "Relax, you don't have to answer now okay? You don't need to tell me everything now. But you do need to tell me, you need to let me in."

He put his head back on my shoulder and said, "You wouldn't understand."

I chuckled, "I think differently Draco, you aren't the only one with walls up." He stared at me.

I continued talking, I knew saying this would relax him. I knew saying this would make him undertstand.

I said to him, "Draco, I don't intend to break your walls down. I just intend to grow some ivy and climb over."

His head was still on mt shoulder but he relaxed. He then replied with, "How?"

I smiled and remembered that conversation I had with my brother. "By borrowing some seeds from my own ivy."

He stared at me again, he understood. He knew that he wouldn't be the only one telling secrets next time we met.

He smiled, "OK, I guess we will both need some climbing lessons."

"Maybe we will."

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 **Look out for it :)**

 **Please review :)**

 **Bye my ponies :)**


End file.
